Thankful For:

-On Monday I was completely enlightened as I exercised and listened to a podcast about being happy.  This secular researcher has basically uncovered some gospel truths as he has studied what makes people happy.  Living with gratitude, for example.  Building relationships with people you love.  As I listened, scriptures kept coming to mind and I even got what felt like some small inspiration for my BYU Alumni job.

-One day I was reading in Alma 8.  It talked about how Alma wrestled much in the spirit and in mighty prayer that the Lord would pour his spirit out on the people of Ammonihah and that he could baptize them unto repentance.  And they rejected him.  And he was so very sorrowful and was leaving the city all dejected, and then AN ANGEL visited him--the same one he had seen before, which seemed like a tender mercy to all involved--and he was forgiven of his sins.  His spiritual work for others saved him.  Others later, but it saved him right then.  And then he was given hope, and a great companion, and really awesome opportunities to teach.  It was amazing.  I thought about you, Mariah.  I imagine you get plenty of chances to wrestle in the spirit and then be rejected.  But I also imagine you get great blessings even as you are serving and having trials.  I see them in your letters.

-Thursday Amanda moved in for the week.  And this penniless, homeless, bipolar, single mother with no hair has been a complete blessing to our family.  She babysat when Willa didn't want to on Friday, and then again so we could take Willa and Wyatt out on Saturday night.  And she sang in the choir with me, and she watched the littles so I could go to a presidency meeting because Alan wasn't home from church in time, and she also hung out with them while he and I planned our week.  For someone who has so few resources, she does so much good.

-Friday night Alan and I got to go to the temple!  And we made it to the earlier session and even ate dinner too.  I even got to serve as a proxy for someone I'm related to, thanks to Aunt Ruby and Mom and Dad.  And I'm amazed at how you are taught EVERY TIME.  Such great things.  Such grand views!  And such a fabulous spirit.  Like a fire!

-Today in church I got a small window to really listen to one of the talks, and it was directed at me.  Her topic was Sister Marriott's talk from conference about turning our will to the Lord and I realized that I often think I can fix myself, and she said words that made me realize that not only can I not do it, but I don't need to.  What I need to do is ask for the Savior's help.  I have been trying so hard to be better, but trying without asking for the help I need of the atonement.  My scripture this week is D&C 4: 6-7 to remind me what I need to do and how I need to go about doing it.