Today my RS lesson was about Elder Holland's talk from the October 2013 General Conference. I explained that it was about mental illness and depression, which is the first time in my knowledge that has been addressed to a large audience by a prophet of God. I did a little research to find out how relevant that is to most of us. According to the CDC and National Institute for Mental Health, 28% of adults currently have, or have had within the last year, a mental illness. 50% of all adults will experience a mental illness in their lifetime. Women are 70% more likely to suffer mental illness than men. So is this relevant? YES! We WILL be touched by mental illness (probably especially depression) in our lives or in the life of someone we love.
Elder Holland started by talking about brilliant and righteous people who have suffered from depression: Einstein, Lincoln, George Albert Smith and even himself. I used his quote that says that Heavenly Father expects us to use all the resources at our disposal: priesthood blessings AND medical treatments. And we spent quite a bit of time talking about how treatable these things are. 80% of people are helped by medical treatment for depression. That is a really encouraging success rate! One sister shared that she was bipolar and is happy to talk to anyone who shares that struggle. She still goes through emotional times and normal ups and downs, but has remained episode free for nine years by consistently taking her medication.
We talked about how to recognize depression in ourselves and others. One sister talked about the complete absence of feeling and being unable to receive pleasure (or even pain or anger) from things that usually caused that when she is depressed. We talked about depletion depression and watching for stress and things that you know to be triggers for yourself.
Then I asked what we can do to help someone who is struggling with this. I used my mom's inspiration that we should first and foremost pray. And listen to the answer, and then not ignore answers that seem simple. Another sister shared that when her best friend went through a deep depression when she was 12, she knew it was her job to help her because her family was dealing with other huge stresses. She just called every day, even when her friend refused to talk to her, and felt inspiration with what to do or say every day. As an adult, her friend told her how that was the only thing that helped her make it through, and she knew that the things she did were inspired by the Lord. Another sister talked about people who were just there for her during hard times.
The sister who has bipolar disorder raised her hand and said the only thing that helped her when she was in some really dark places was reciting the Young Women's theme and KNOWING for sure that she was a daughter of God who loves her.
I closed with this quote from Elder Holland:
"Trust in God. Hold on in His love. Know that one day the dawn will break brightly and all shadows of mortality will flee. Though we may feel we are “like a broken vessel,” as the Psalmist says, 10 we must remember, that vessel is in the hands of the divine potter. Broken minds can be healed just the way broken bones and broken hearts are healed. While God is at work making those repairs, the rest of us can help by being merciful, nonjudgmental, and kind."
I ended by testifying that we are ALL the broken vessel, in need of the healing Christ offers through the atonement. Then I sat down.
The sister conducting tearfully told about her sister dying last week and having to care for her reeling brother-in-law who is clinging to her for dear life. She asked for our prayers. Many of the sisters cried at different times in the lesson, but my favorites (besides the ones who added so much with their comments) were the ones who were just paying attention and nodding at me that I was doing okay with this topic that was such a hard one to address.
After the closing prayer, a sister who has had more than her fair share of these kinds of struggles raised her hand and said, "And if they don't get better even after you help them, remember it isn't your fault." I loved that.
This may have been the hardest lesson I have ever taught. I never felt like it was fully organized or formed, even as I was teaching it. So I am particularly grateful for all the help I had giving it--for all the people who participated and for my mom for helping me pray and receive inspiration on what to focus on.
Elder Holland started by talking about brilliant and righteous people who have suffered from depression: Einstein, Lincoln, George Albert Smith and even himself. I used his quote that says that Heavenly Father expects us to use all the resources at our disposal: priesthood blessings AND medical treatments. And we spent quite a bit of time talking about how treatable these things are. 80% of people are helped by medical treatment for depression. That is a really encouraging success rate! One sister shared that she was bipolar and is happy to talk to anyone who shares that struggle. She still goes through emotional times and normal ups and downs, but has remained episode free for nine years by consistently taking her medication.
We talked about how to recognize depression in ourselves and others. One sister talked about the complete absence of feeling and being unable to receive pleasure (or even pain or anger) from things that usually caused that when she is depressed. We talked about depletion depression and watching for stress and things that you know to be triggers for yourself.
Then I asked what we can do to help someone who is struggling with this. I used my mom's inspiration that we should first and foremost pray. And listen to the answer, and then not ignore answers that seem simple. Another sister shared that when her best friend went through a deep depression when she was 12, she knew it was her job to help her because her family was dealing with other huge stresses. She just called every day, even when her friend refused to talk to her, and felt inspiration with what to do or say every day. As an adult, her friend told her how that was the only thing that helped her make it through, and she knew that the things she did were inspired by the Lord. Another sister talked about people who were just there for her during hard times.
The sister who has bipolar disorder raised her hand and said the only thing that helped her when she was in some really dark places was reciting the Young Women's theme and KNOWING for sure that she was a daughter of God who loves her.
I closed with this quote from Elder Holland:
"Trust in God. Hold on in His love. Know that one day the dawn will break brightly and all shadows of mortality will flee. Though we may feel we are “like a broken vessel,” as the Psalmist says, 10 we must remember, that vessel is in the hands of the divine potter. Broken minds can be healed just the way broken bones and broken hearts are healed. While God is at work making those repairs, the rest of us can help by being merciful, nonjudgmental, and kind."
I ended by testifying that we are ALL the broken vessel, in need of the healing Christ offers through the atonement. Then I sat down.
The sister conducting tearfully told about her sister dying last week and having to care for her reeling brother-in-law who is clinging to her for dear life. She asked for our prayers. Many of the sisters cried at different times in the lesson, but my favorites (besides the ones who added so much with their comments) were the ones who were just paying attention and nodding at me that I was doing okay with this topic that was such a hard one to address.
After the closing prayer, a sister who has had more than her fair share of these kinds of struggles raised her hand and said, "And if they don't get better even after you help them, remember it isn't your fault." I loved that.
This may have been the hardest lesson I have ever taught. I never felt like it was fully organized or formed, even as I was teaching it. So I am particularly grateful for all the help I had giving it--for all the people who participated and for my mom for helping me pray and receive inspiration on what to focus on.
Oh wow. That is a tough lesson to give. It sounds like you did really well with a difficult one. Thank goodness people were willing to share!
ReplyDeleteIt really touched my heart to hear about these good people sharing their struggles.
Wow - I bet that was a very difficult topic. One I have never had to speak on and hope I never do. But if I do, I will know who to call for help! Once again...I wish I was in RS with you today.
ReplyDeleteAngi
It sounds like you lead with your heart and people responded with theirs. WAY TO GO!!!
ReplyDeleteI saw the look of relief on a friend's face when she asked about someone, and I told her, "It's ok with me if my friends are depressed." Not every problem can be fixed by me.
ReplyDelete